Pine Hill Road Diaries: "Good Men, Last Dayz"

Daniela's Men: Nasir (15), Nile (11) and Naim (6)

Last night, I had an intense back-and-forth with an amazing female friend. Like most of my subject matter these days, we discussed the lack of cultured and civilized prospective companions to build with today in our respective areas. Hey, I was once a believer in having to trim down on what you want in a woman/man because the pickings are so slim. With that being said, I guess I need to explain my position on this topic.

Me and my little lady. My and Daniela's daughter (N'kya).

I’ve been alone for one year now. I’ve not been interested in any woman since my wife, but there are moments when a female voice or physical presence is desired. Now when I say, “desired”, I’m not talking specifically about sex or anything on that level. What I mean by “Desired” is someone to talk to and do things with. Granted, I have some awesome female confidants who allow me to vent and are there for an ear or shoulder to lean on when I’m in a “Daniela Moment”, which is pretty often. These confidants, who all are amazing women, know my dedication and loyalty to my wife (Daniela) and our family. They are very respectful of her memory and my emotional dealing process. I say dealing because I doubt my emotions will ever actually heal. So in short, my desires aren’t physical yet, more so a friendship of sorts. Whatever… You all know my philosophy of everything is everything!

My homie Jeff Johnson: raising four sons alone. Soldier!

I spend a lot of time wondering if people today are asking for too much in a prospective mate or companion. I’ve had these conversations with my male friends who are very good men; strong men of faith and values. These friends are caught in the general idea of many women that they are weak. Whoa, yeah, I said women consider them and men like us weak. I say weak based on ghetto mythologies. Men who love their children and sacrifice for those children knowing he is the sole provider and in essence sole controller of their well-being. Men who define loving his woman as a provider, friend, co-parent to their children, lover and whatever is needed to assist her in her goals and endeavors. These are men who don’t see their women as a paycheck. These men create and build for their children and women to succeed and excel as a divine unit as one. What else is there? What else should there be? A man who treats his woman with the upmost respect building understanding as one.

Weak! This man, these men are considered weak because he would rather work than hustle. He would rather go out with his woman and come home with her instead of kicking it with his guys and being tempted by other women and who may or may not come home. Weak! Not like these street cats who have been in the streets and still haven’t caught a lick! These cats who are stuck in their teens. Hahaha… funny cats is funny to me!